Paris is a city of contradictions—grand yet intimate, indulgent yet restrained. When I lived there, I often found myself at Café de Flore, one of those legendary Left Bank cafés where the tables spill into the street and every moment feels cinematic.
And so I did what expats often do best: I watched. Not idle people-watching, but noticing what French women truly ordered when they thought no one was paying attention.
Mireille Guiliano’s book French Women Don’t Get Fat suggested that French women had unlocked a glamorous code of moderation: Champagne, yogurt, and silk scarves. But I wanted to see for myself. Could pleasure and slimness really coexist?
What I Saw on the Plates
The truth was subtler and more human than any diet book could capture.
I saw women order warm croissants with salted butter—but only one. They paired it with café crème, sipping slowly, never rushing.
I saw them linger over a salade niçoise or a plate of haricots verts with grilled fish, eating one careful bite at a time, pausing for laughter or conversation.
And yes, dessert appeared. A shared tarte tatin, three spoonfuls of mousse au chocolat, or half a lemon tart. Not guilt-ridden “cheating.” Not “earning” dessert at the gym. Just a small act of joy, fully savored.
The Contrast with Home
Later, back in America, I noticed the difference. Meals there were hurried, oversized, and swallowed with more shame than pleasure. Food was fuel or punishment, rarely companionship.
In Paris, eating was not a battlefield.
It was a ritual.
Meals had beginnings, middles, and endings.
French women weren’t chasing keto or paleo trends. They engaged with food as if it were part of life’s conversation, not an enemy to conquer.
For context, the French Ministry of Health emphasizes the importance of mindful eating and shared meals as part of cultural wellbeing.
The Real Lesson from Café de Flore
French women don’t “get fat” because of deprivation. They stay connected through presence.
They:
- Choose quality over quantity.
- Eat slowly, letting time nourish.
- Stop before fullness becomes discomfort.
- Allow pleasure without shame.
It isn’t magic. It’s mindfulness dressed in a well-tailored coat.
Psychologists and nutrition experts agree that mindful eating improves health and satisfaction. Presence changes everything.
The Connection to My Work
When I sit with clients who struggle with weight or emotional eating, I think of those Paris mornings. Beneath the diets and shame, what they truly crave isn’t less food—but more satisfaction, connection, and presence.
That’s the heart of my Hidden Hunger™ work: hunger isn’t always about food. Sometimes it’s about longing, loneliness, or the need to slow down enough to taste life again.
You don’t have to move to Paris or smoke elegantly while nibbling a macaron. But you can bring some Café de Flore wisdom into your daily life: eat with attention, let pleasure in, and trust that satisfaction is more sustainable than struggle.
Your Own Café de Flore Moment
The women I watched at Café de Flore weren’t chasing perfection. They were chasing connection and the subtle art of “enough.”
So the next time you sit down with a meal—whether it’s a croissant, a salad, or your grandmother’s pasta—try the Paris experiment: slow down, savor, and stop when you’re satisfied.
You may discover what I did in that café corner: pleasure, in moderation, is the most nourishing food of all.
Ready to uncover your own “Café de Flore moment”? Book a Free Clarity Session and let’s explore the hidden hungers shaping your choices.