By Coach Evie Sullivan — Healing Coach for the Deeply Curious
Learning to work with your fear can change everything. It shows up like an uninvited guest in your body — tight in the chest, shallow in the breath, loud in the mind. It whispers worst-case scenarios… and sometimes screams them, too.
It’s easy to feel powerless when fear takes over. But here’s the truth: you can work with your fear, not against it — and in doing so, reclaim your breath, your body, and your calm.
Why We Run from Fear — And Why It Doesn’t Work
When fear shows up, most of us slam the door in its face. We numb it, run from it, argue with it, or pretend it’s not there. We armor up. We stay busy. We binge, scroll, sleep, or strategize — anything but feel it.
But here’s the secret: fear doesn’t go away when you avoid it. It only gets louder. Hungrier. Wilder. Because fear, like all emotions, is designed to move through you. And when you lock it in the basement, it doesn’t stay quiet — it lifts weights, learns how to pick locks, and starts whispering at 3:00 AM.
Clinical insight from Psychology Today notes that facing your fears reminds the brain that growth and confidence lie on the other side, and that exposure to fear is essential for protecting your mental health.
How to Start Working With Your Fear
So what if, instead of bracing against fear… you flirted with it a little? What if you turned toward it with curiosity? What if you leaned in — not with panic, but with a sly little smile — and said:
“Okay, my friend. What are you really trying to tell me?”
Fear isn’t the villain. It’s the bodyguard who’s been on duty too long without sleep. It’s your nervous system trying to keep you safe using outdated blueprints. It’s the part of you that still believes love is dangerous, failure is fatal, and rest is weakness.
Fear means well, but it’s using methods from a version of you that no longer exists. That’s why the radical move is this: instead of asking, “How do I get rid of this fear?” — ask, “How do I get to know it?”
When you choose to work with your fear, everything starts to change. Let it sit with you. Let it shake a little. Let it speak. And when you do, you’ll notice something remarkable: fear softens. It doesn’t vanish instantly, but it loses its grip — because it’s been heard.
Reclaiming Your Body, Breath & Power
The moment you stop fighting fear, you stop feeding it. And in that moment, you begin to reclaim your breath. Your body. Your power.
Harvard Health explains that anxiety and stress are normal responses—but calmly engaging with them (rather than avoiding them) signals safety to your nervous system and helps restore balance.
Healing doesn’t begin by banishing fear. It begins when you work with your fear—when you dance with it.
A gentle tango. A curious gaze. A whispered:
“You’re not the boss of me, but I’m willing to listen.”
And that, my dear, is the beginning of freedom.
Ready to stop running from fear — and start working with your fear instead?
Book your free consultation today or explore my healing and coaching services.